Ola Shahin walked into the Kaimai Range with no intention of coming back out. She parked her car on Lindemann Road and set off with no food and no direction in mind.
Nobody knew where she was going, and that was the idea. She wanted to disappear, to let the elements take her quietly and without fuss.
She didn’t expect nature to instead save her life.
For hours, Shahin walked the bush track, stopping often to lay down and find peace amongst the bird song and the trees. She was searching for a final resting place, but what she found was a tranquility so alluring, it convinced her to keep walking.
She eventually found the refuge of Waitawheta Hut, close to 10km from her parked car. Exhausted, and with nobody else in the hut, she quickly fell asleep on a bunk.
Waking later that evening, Shahin found she was no longer alone – two trampers had arrived and were settling in for the night.
She told them of her day, and shared her true intentions for visiting the Kaimais. Her companions listened without judgment, and the three spent the night in typical hut fashion; playing cards, drinking hot chocolate, stargazing and hunting for glowworms. Shahin had found her peace, her place, and her people.
“It definitely did save my life, as clichéd as it might sound,” she says. “That day made me realise that I do have a safe place.”
The following morning, Shahin decided it was time to brave the world and began the walk back to her car. Unbeknown to her, she had been reported missing and police, search and rescue and other volunteers had located her car, and their paths would cross that afternoon.
Shahin, 25, talks openly of her experience in the hope she can help those who feel they’re not allowed to have mental health struggles.
“I believe everything happens for a reason, and the reason I had to go through it is to help others,” she says.
Growing up in a community that didn’t talk about depression, Shahin felt isolated in her feelings and unable to find support.
“A lot of people don’t talk to others because they’re ashamed. Stigma is a horrible reason for people to die.”
Since that day in November 2017, tramping has become a lifeline for Shahin. Before her night in Waitawheta, she had never stayed in a tramping hut, and now she gets out as often as she can.
Time alone in nature continues to refresh and relax her, and she finds fulfilment taking in the small details of her environment, the colours and sounds that often go unnoticed.
While relief comes in different forms for everybody, Shahin feels grateful she has found her own source of peace in nature.

