What are the secret ingredients that make a walking duo work? By Diana Ward

What makes walking partners gel? The Walk1200km participants who shared their stories agree the one-on-one dynamic is different from walking in a group, and it’s even more intense when you’re with a person for days on end. While the nature of relationships differs, the attributes we look for in a companion are surprisingly similar.

Radu Puiu and Iuliana

Iuliana got me into walking. I wasn’t big on exercise until she hauled me up Mt Manaia in 2017. I almost blacked out, breathless, and was forced to turn back. It was a big wake-up call. I had to improve my fitness. I bought a treadmill and started walking.

Walking is now a huge part of our lives, every weekend, in Auckland. Typical would be the Karamatura and Ōmanawanui Tracks combined, and every two months we walk the Tongariro Northern Circuit in one day.

Iuliana is the only walking partner for me. We’re on the same wavelength and she’s the main driver of our walking. She plans itineraries and meals – homemade and mostly dehydrated. It’s a big job preparing food for a 10-day walk. We split our pack loads evenly, walk at a similar pace and sleep at the same time. The key is open communication. We listen and try not to please the other. Honesty avoids misunderstandings. If one of us isn’t comfortable with something, we modify our plan.

If I go quiet for too long, Iuliana checks in with me, and vice versa. On the Dusky Track, some tough and muddy days tested our patience. We got through by waiting and lending a hand when the other fell behind. It was mentally rather than physically hard, but working together made it bearable. Similarly, when crossing Browning Pass on the Three Passes Route, we took a wrong turn and ended up off-trail on a precipitous ridge – we had to crawl at times. We took it slowly, reminding each other to focus and that we’d get home to see our kids. When we eventually rejoined the track, we kissed the ground!

Seven years ago, I never thought I’d be exploring the South Island on foot and camping under the stars with my wife.

Fee Shine and friend Jo 

I have a list of why Jo and I are walking mates. We’re both nurses and met at a work event. We clicked, and kept in touch when she moved from Dunedin for a while. Now she’s back and we’re walking together. It’s been a year and we’ve done day walks in Otago and, recently, the three-day Four Peaks Track.

Having nursing in common helps how we bond and approach our walking. Our work is mentally and physically demanding. Outside, where we’re happier, the exercise is beneficial but so is the conversation: we laugh a lot and share deeply, although work talk is off limits. We know how quickly life can end for some, and I think that affects how we walk. We savour every moment, whether a view down a valley or the sighting of a bird. We’re safety conscious without being over-cautious and we always carry a good first aid kit!

Apart from our nursing, we’ve had similar journeys – we’re both mums who’ve been through relationship breakdowns. We ‘get’ how things are for the other. Our values are much the same; we’re both up for adventure and are well organised. We like the same foods and both have a weakness for salt and vinegar chips. That’s become our ‘thing’!

Even our differences serve us well. Jo has a spiritual side and brings a lovely calmness to our walks. She’s into plants and I’ve learned a lot from her. I’ve done more tramping than Jo, who is foremost a runner. I’ve lent her gear so she can test what works and gradually build her kit up. I tend to plan our trips, and I love that Jo is so enthusiastic when I make recommendations. We’d like to do longer tramps together, perhaps overseas, and I’m keen to volunteer as a hut ranger. I wonder if Jo would be up for that?

Niki Ormsby and son Devon 

Two years ago I had a tough year at the school where I work with children with complex needs. I’d also had bariatric surgery and wanted to control my weight and fitness. Someone suggested I join Walk1200km and it seemed the ideal choice for me, especially as I had the perfect walking mate at home – my 16-year-old son. Devon suffers from a severe form of migraine that impacts his life. Despite this, he plays lacrosse at national level and must maintain his fitness, particularly in the lead-up to tournaments. When I suggested we walk together he was keen – it’d be good for both of us.

We live in Kihikihi. Our first walks were up Kakepuku and Hakarimata. We’ve since done longer walks – the Tongariro Alpine Crossing, Maungatautiri and   Pirongia. We’re good at motivating each other. Devon is empathetic and aware if I’ve had a bad week. “Come on, Mum,” he says, “Let’s go!” He’s such a tonic.

Things flow when we’re walking. We’re both energetic and love being in nature. Sometimes he bounds ahead but will happily wait for me. I’ll find him sitting quietly or taking photos. Photography is his passion.

Our most memorable walk was the Tongariro Alpine Crossing. I loved the vast landscapes and the four seasons in one day. We even had snow! Being with Devon was the highlight, though. I suffered during the last few kilometres of the downhill. Exhausted and in agony – my toenails were black – I wanted to give up, but Devon kept me talking and took my mind off the pain.

I cherish our time together. It won’t last forever, as he aims to study photography overseas when he finishes college.

Sophie McInnes and Tūī 

‘Walk’ is a dangerous word in our house if you want to sit and chill. Wherever Tūī is, she’ll hear it and race for the door! You can’t resist those big brown eyes, the leaping and circling, and you just have to grab her harness and head out.

I wouldn’t keep to my Walk1200km targets were it not for Tūī. She doesn’t tolerate dawdling. I should be thankful, really, because when I tire she pulls me along!

Tūī is a rescue pup who came into our lives two years ago. She’s my perfect walking companion, though she’d likely prefer me to be her running bestie. We used to pair up for park run events, but last year I broke my leg so now we’re walkers. 

She never fails to lift my spirits. When I was at a low ebb recovering from the fall, she’d give me snuggles when I couldn’t walk at all, then got me out. While she barks occasionally, she’s not big on conversation! That’s fine, as our household can be noisy, and our walks give me peace and thinking time.

Most of our walks are around our subdivision, although I’d like to venture further afield. Recently I attended a talk on trail-walking gear for dogs. I’ll get some for Tūī. The days of sharing the same water bottle are over!

What to look for in a walking mate

→ Similar walking pace and fitness level

→ Someone you know well or feel relaxed with

→ Willingness to do trial walksto test compatibility and capability, especially if multi-dayers are planned

→ The right amount of talk and quiet

→ Well matched for duration, distance and degree of difficulty of the walks; doesn’t exaggerate their skill level or endurance

→ Safety conscious and calm when things don’t go to plan; good problem-solving skills

→ Has appropriate gear, is self-reliant and will ask for help if needed

→ Aware of the other’s physical and mental state

→ Easy going, adaptable, supportive and positive

→ Good communication skills; able to talk through differences that could cause conflict or jeopardise safety